Discourage litigation. Persuade your neighbors to compromise whenever you can. Point out to them how the nominal winner is often a real loser—in fees, expenses and waste of time.

—Abraham Lincoln

Mediation is a consensual, cooperative, confidential process in which a skilled neutral party facilitates the reaching of a negotiated settlement to resolve various kinds of disputes. The mediator assists the parties to resolve their dispute by helping them to open and strengthen channels of communication, clarify positions, identify underlying interests, separate out negotiable from non-negotiable issues, and explore possible solutions. Mediation empowers individuals and organizations to take control of a case, disagreement, or dispute, and creatively arrive at a solution, rather than having one imposed by a judge or jury. It is informal, inexpensive, and effective, and avoids the long delays, waste of resources, and emotional drain often associated with litigation. Virtually all kinds of disputes, whether a lawsuit has been filed or not, are suitable for mediation.

Mediation is a flexible process that is tailored to the needs of the participants. Most mediations, however, generally follow the following format:

• An initial joint meeting between the parties and the mediator to clarify the procedures, answer questions, exchange relevant information, address possibly unexpressed assumptions and expectations, and allow the parties to make a brief statement of the issues.
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• In joint sessions, separate caucuses, or a combination of both, the mediator will assist the parties to understand their opponent's point of view, will ask questions to help identify fundamental interests, focus the issues, and narrow the matters in dispute, and will offer guidance in moving toward compromise and resolution.
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• To ensure closure, a written agreement settling the matter will be drawn up when the mediation has successfully resolved the dispute.
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Mediation has many potential advantages over traditional dispute resolution methods, including:

• Permits rapid and often immediate closure on lingering disputes
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• Minimizes or eliminates the expense of lawyers and litigation
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• Empowers the parties by permitting them to co-create their own solution, rather than having one imposed by a lawyer, judge, jury, or arbitrator
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• Provides maximum flexibility
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• Minimizes the risk of damage to ongoing relationships
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• Reduces the bitterness that is often part of the adversarial litigation process and that frequently follows a winner-take-all courtroom verdict
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For those who are interested in the transformative aspects of the process, my approach to mediation can offer the following additional advantages:

• Learn creative approaches to conflict management and resolution
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• Experience peace, calm, and centeredness in the midst of conflict
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• Contribute to changing the tone of our litigious society by engaging in high-minded dialogue with those with whom you are in conflict
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